One more time for the cheap seats: Cheesesteaks do not come with green peppers on them. You get that, ESPN?
Apparently not, judging by the promo the sports network put out in advance of tonight's Eagles vs. Redskins game. In it, the folks at ESPN attempt to teach us how to make a proper cheesesteak but end up demonstrating how to screw up what is essentially the world's most straightforward sandwich.
And, unfortunately, the problems in the video, dubbed "A Taste of Monday Night," go a lot deeper than some fried peppers that don't belong.
From the start, just about everything in the 45-second clip, which features narration from ESPN analyst Jon Gruden, is wrong. The onions used are sliced, not diced, as is standard. Green peppers are added to the onions and stirred in at length, making the mixture somehow even more incorrect. The meat is the right type (rib eye), but cut into thick, fajita-style strips rather than shaved. The cheese choice, yellow American mixed with provolone, is just weird, and the chef in the clip melts it with aid of a pan lid rather than covering everything with a split hoagie roll. For shame.
So many errors for such a simple food is interesting, considering that two of the cheesesteak's four standard ingredients are in its name. It's like messing up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, only more offensive to Philadelphians, as many let ESPN know online.
Famed Philadelphia loudmouth Ralph Garman, known for his work with director Kevin Smith, for example, called the recipe "fajitas on a roll" and, less politely, a "Jon Gruden-made crap feast":
Jim's on South Street (Garman's favorite steak spot), meanwhile, offered a monosyllabic rebuttal to ESPN's sandwich, which only mocks the food that gives the shop its livelihood:
Others, however, were outright offended:
And those are just the ones without profanity. But, then, that type of response is perhaps to be expected, given how passionate Philadelphians are about their food.