Did girlfriend's medical question stirrup problems in her relationship
Q: I'm a middle aged woman going through some change of life issues. When I asked the gentleman I've been dating since spring to accompany me to my doctor's appointment, he said yes. But when it was time to go, I started texting him. I never heard back so I had to go alone. That made me feel insecure so I also called him a few times and left messages. He eventually called me back and started reading me all my messages. He said I was wrong to come at him like that. But I was upset and trying to make sure he hadn't forgotten the appointment. My question for you is, was I wrong to expect him to honor his word and accompany me to my appointment?
Steve: No, you weren't wrong. Your gentleman friend, on the other hand, is a dirt ball. Instead of saying "no" when you asked him to accompany you, he said "yes." I guess he didn't have the guts to say no. Easier to say yes and then ignore it. That's what a liar or gutless bum does. The fact he then complained about your calls made it even worse. My opinion? As LaVern Baker & Jackie Wilson once sang, "Think Twice" or he's gonna get dumped.
Mia: Um, girlfriend what were you thinking? Dude disappeared because he wasn't interested in sitting outside an exam room while you're undergoing a gynecology exam. I mean, why should he be? You're not his wife. You're probably not even his steady girlfriend. Yet, you expect him to act like he's your life-partner and interested in your menopausal issues. He probably only asked you out in the first place because he thought you were cute and thought it would be fun. But you want to drag him with you through things that a grown woman really ought to handle on her own. Judging from his reaction, it was way too much too soon. Next time, take a girlfriend or go alone.
Q: With the explosion of people who can meet anyone since all the personal boyfriend/girlfriend stuff became available on the computer. What kind of romance would you suggest? I'm an "A" student so don't want to waste my time on average-thinking guys. What would be the best site to use?
Steve: Just about anywhere. There are tons to choose from such as Zoosk, Match, Our Time, eHarmony and EliteSingles. Will you love 'em? Doubtful. But they give you names and details on what it is you want. In theory you can hit Mr. Perfect. You can also hit on Mr. Liar. Really, you never know. Try to stay positive, but most of this stuff is a lying longshot, so go for the shortest meet 'em/greet 'em. Less time for torture that way.
Mia: Online dating is fun. Sign up on a couple of websites. Make sure you have really good photos. I suggest that you forgo the cell phone images and instead get some professional ones made. Include a headshot and some full-length photos too. Keep your profile upbeat. Don't exaggerate and don't lie. You need to be willing to stand in your own truth about who you are and what you are looking for and hopefully you'll match with someone who does the same. Good luck!
Between them, Steve and Mia have logged more than a few decades in the single-and-dating world. They're also wise to the ways of married life. They don't always agree, but they have plenty of answers. Contact them at S&M c/o Daily News, 801 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19107 or steveandmia@phillynews.com.